Results 141 to 150 of 4555
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Tsikot Member Rank 2
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March 2nd, 2011 08:30 PM #141After losing her husband almost four years ago, Anna started dating again. She met a guy and they took to one another. After six weeks of dating, they went for a weekend away. Their first night there, they both undressed. There she stood nude, except for a pair of black lacy panties while he was in his birthday suit. He asked, “Why the black panties?” She replied, “My breasts you can fondle, my body is yours to explore, but down there I am still in mourning.” He knew he was not getting lucky that night.
The following night was the same thing. She stood there wearing the black panties, and he was in his birthday suit but now he was wearing a black condom. She looked at him and asked, “What’s with the black condom?” He replied, “I would like to offer my deepest condolences.”
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Tsikot Member Rank 2
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March 2nd, 2011 08:32 PM #142Isang gabi, naglalakad ang isang lalaki sa may tulay nang may makita
siyang babaeng nasa taas ng gilid nito at magtatangkang magpatiwakal. "
Huwag, " sigaw ng lalaki. At sa kabutihang palad ay nakumbinsi ang babae
at siya ' y bumaba
Lalaki: Ano bang problema mo' t naisipan mong gawin yan.
Babae: Kasi, iniwan ako ng boypren ko' t sumama sa ibang babae.
Lalaki: Miss, ganyan din ang problema ko pero di ko inisip na
magpakamatay.
Babae: So, anong gagawin natin? Nag-isip sandali ang lalaki at sinabi...
Lalaki: Kung gusto mo, maghiganti tayo sa kanila.
Babae: Paanong paghihiganti?
Lalaki: Alam mo na ang ibig kong sabihin... (sabay kindat sa babae na
nakuha naman ni babae ang ipinahiwatig na yon).
Maya maya'y nasa isang kuwarto na sila ng motel at nangyari na nga ang
di dapat mangyari. Nang makaraos si lalaki, nagsindi siya ng yosi. Nang
halos filter na lang ay biglang nagsabi si babae ng:
"Maghiganti ul! i tayo " .Medyo pagod, pero pinagbigyan uli niya ang
request ni babae.Nang makaraos uli, nagsindi uli si lalaki ng yosi. Nasa
kalahati ! pa lang ang yosi.
Babae: Maghiganti uli tayo.
Medyo nangangatog na ang mga tuhod pero dahil sa hilig, muling
pinagbigyan niya si babae. Muling nakaraos ang dalawa. Nagsindi uli si
lalaki ng yosi.! Unang hitit pa lang niya ay
Babae: Ganti uli tayo. Talagang lupaypay na si manoy niya pero para
huwag mapahiya ay muling pinagbigyan niya ang kahilingan ng babae.
Pagkatapos kumuha siya ng yosi. Sisindihan pa lang nang biglang...
Babae: Ganti uli tayo.
Lalaki: ' TANGNA NAMAN! PATAWARIN NA NATIN SILA!!!!
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Tsikot Member Rank 2
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March 2nd, 2011 08:38 PM #143Anak: Ma, hingi sana ako ng P50.
Nanay: P40? Ang laki naman ng P30! Anong gagawin mo sa P20? Akala mo madaling kumita ng P10? O, eto P5.
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Verified Tsikot Member
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March 3rd, 2011 10:30 PM #144Well, if a joke needs to be explained then it is not that fun anymore. But this one made a lot of us curious. I guess that made it fun.
Originally Posted by e-bundok
hehe.. sorry po.
i think the joke follows the syllogism that:
i) women have the propensity to use headache as an excuse to avoid ***
ii) apparently, the golfer inherited the woman's traits following the hand transplant
iii) and that includes her disinterest to ***, hence the proverbial excuse
iv) thus, so the golfer's unlucky fate. . .
pero hindi din po ako sigurado dito kasi it doesn't look that funny superficially.
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Verified Tsikot Member
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March 3rd, 2011 10:35 PM #145May kilala akong nadisgrasya ang mukha. Nasabuyan ng asido. Napaayos naman niya mukha nya. The doctors grafted some skin from his butt on the damaged part of his face. If you see him, you will never know that he had undergone surgery. There is only one problem. When you ask him to sit down, he puts his face on the chair.
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twoyotas
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March 7th, 2011 07:52 PM #146MATH TEACHER: Ano ang pinagkaiba ng 69 sa 6.9?
NAUGHTY STUDENT: Ma'am pareho lang po sila ng position kaya lang mas kadiri ang 6.9 kasi may period!
--
What is Vine Tea?
Vine Tee Is Ur Soak Lee in
peep tea when u pa load
toar tee so vine tea is your
...soak lee
)
GETS MO ?
Read It Slowly
--
Nanay: Anak, kaliskisan mo nga yung binili kong isda..
Anak: WTF?!
Nanay: Ano?! minumura mo ba ako anak?!
...
Anak: hindi po nay, sabi ko.. Where's The Fish?
...
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Disturbing the Peace
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March 7th, 2011 11:57 PM #147Isang araw, may isang Kano na inabutan ng pag-ihi habang nag-aabang ng sasakyan. Wala siyang makitang CR kaya nagtiyaga siyang umihi sa pader. Biglang dumating ang isang tindero ng tubig at nagsisigaw. " TUBIG! TUBIG!" Nataranta ang Kano. "Hey! Hey! Stop shouting, you idiot! This is not TOO BIG! It's a regular size only. =)) HAHAHAHA. ♥
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Verified Tsikot Member
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March 8th, 2011 09:32 PM #148Misis: Inday, napansin mo ba ang barong ni Sir mo lagi na lang may lipstick.
Maid: Opo nga Ma'am! Mukhang niloloko na tayo ni Sir ah?!
****
Economics Professor: Now tell me what is the similarity between your bank account and a bra?
Student: Well, the more in it, the better interest you get.
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Social Dementia
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March 11th, 2011 03:09 PM #1493 guys walk into a bar
The first guy says "I got the smallest arm in the world"
The second guy "I have the smallest head in the world"
The third guy "I have got the smallest dick in the world"
The 3 guys go to the Guinness World Records
The first guy comes back and says "I really do have the smallest arm in the world"
The second guy comes back and says "Amazing, I do have the smallest head in the world"
The third guy comes back angry "Who the F**K is JUSTIN BEIBER?!"
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Tsikot Member Rank 5
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Originally Posted by e-bundok
As expected, in response to Tesla’s entry into the Philippines market, Ford will be bringing in the...
Tesla Philippines