FOUR LESSONS OF BUSINESS & MANAGEMENT

[Kennon_road]

eto tiyak may aral kayong makukuha
FOUR LESSONS OF BUSINESS & MANAGEMENT.

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Lesson Number One
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A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw
the crow, and asked him, " Can I also sit like you and do nothing all
day long? " The crow answered: " Sure, why not. " So, the rabbit sat
on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox
appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Management Lesson 1: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be
sitting very, very high up.

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Lesson Number Two
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A turkey was chatting with a bull. " I would love to be able to get to
the top of that tree, " sighed the turkey, " but I haven ' t got the
energy. " Well, why don ' t you nibble on some of my droppings? "
replied the bull. " They ' re packed with nutrients. " The turkey
pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough
strength to reach the first branch of the tree. The next day, after
eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a
fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon
he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the
tree.

Management Lesson 2: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won ' t
keep you there.

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Lesson Number Three
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When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss. The brain
said, " I should be Boss because I control the whole body responses and
functions. " The feet said, " We should be Boss as we carry the brain
about and get him to where he wants to go. " The hands said, " We
should be the Boss because we do all the work and earn all the money. "
And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until
finally the Asshole spoke up. All the parts laughed at the idea of the
asshole being the Boss. So the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up
and refused to work. Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the
hands clenched, the feet twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic
and the brain fevered. Eventually they all decided that the asshole
should be the Boss, so the motion was passed. All the other parts did
all the work while the Boss just sat and passed out the ****!

Management Lesson 3: You don ' t need brains to be a Boss - any asshole
will do.

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Lesson Number Four
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A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird
froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there,
a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there
in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung
was actually thawing him out! He lay here all warm and happy and soon
began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to
investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the
pile of cow dung and promptly dug him out and ate him!


Management Lesson 4:
1) Not everyone who drops **** on you is your enemy.
2) Not everyone who gets you out of **** is your friend.
3) And when you ' re in deep ****, keep your mouth shut.

[Ungas]

Nice lessons prof! :mrgreen:

[pajerokid]

hahaha!!! :mrgreen:

[boybi]

the best lessons i've heard :mrgreen::mrgreen:

[gretzy]

very nice! share ko sa prof ko! :mrgreen:

[wolfpack]

Very true, very true

[kiper]

And when you ' re in deep ****, keep your mouth shut.

eh 'to baket naman?

hindi ba pwedeng humingi ng tulong kapag may problema ka?

paki-explain nga..

[ssaloon]

oks tong mga to ah!

magamit nga :mrgreen:

[boybi]

oks tong mga to ah!

magamit nga :mrgreen:

alin? yung tataihan ka ng cow? :mrgreen:

[ssaloon]

hinde, yung kakain ng *** :lol: