Is Life Harder for Physically Unattractive People?

[_Cathy_]

My officemate opened up to me and told me he is being treated unfairly at work because he is not good looking. His physical traits are short, dark, fat, hairy and practically bald (in his 20s) He has good teeth though. He compared himself to his cute teammate who he things is the favorite because of his good looks. He basically said life is difficult for him because he is ugly Di ko alam kung maiiyak ako o matatawa

I told him that it had NOTHING to do with looks but more on personality/character. Good looks are a bonus for men but it's not crucial. When it comes to men, looks isn't much of an issue because it can be cancelled out with traits that are more "valued" with men. Scientifically or biologically (?) females are valued for their looks (ability to reproduce and nurture) and males for their strength (ability to provide and protect). So I think looks are more of an issue for women not men.

But my officemate insists that he is being reprimanded at work because of his looks So he thinks good looking people can get away with a lot of things I can't convince him anymore that it's personality that is causing people to treat him badly or stay away from him. My friend thinks my officemate is so insecure which caused him to develop a bad personality. Seems like a catch 22 to me

It makes me wonder, does looks really cause a person to be discriminated or bullied? Have you encountered persons like that in your lifetime?

[uls]

what your officemate experienced all his life is probably like what black men experience in the states

--

attractive people have more advantages

like attractive people are more persuasive

attractive people seem more likeable

attractive people can get away with a lot of things ordinary people can't

[Wh1stl3r]

Most people I know tend to treat good looking people better. That's just natural I guess. But I don't know about life being made hard for you by others just because you are unattractive. I don't think Pinoys are like that.

[arvs18]

Most people I know tend to treat good looking people better. That's just natural I guess. But I don't know about life being made hard for you by others just because you are unattractive. I don't think Pinoys are like that.

I think nakakadagdag din yung Pinoy Social Media and the Media itself, sa discrimination sa less attractive individuals.

Ang sumisikat kasi satin ngayon is yung mga attractive, basta maganda or gwapo, magkakaroon ng Music Album kahit wala namang boses.

Ang less attractive ang ginagawang pang katatawanan or comedy.

[Wh1stl3r]

I think nakakadagdag din yung Pinoy Social Media and the Media itself, sa discrimination sa less attractive individuals.

Ang sumisikat kasi satin ngayon is yung mga attractive, basta maganda or gwapo, magkakaroon ng Music Album kahit wala namang boses.

Ang less attractive ang ginagawang pang katatawanan or comedy.

True. Sa local showbiz, itsura > talent. Pero meron din mga di talaga makalusot na maganda, Jessy Mendiola and Elisse Joson come to mind.

[Jun aka Pekto]

Most people I know tend to treat good looking people better. That's just natural I guess. But I don't know about life being made hard for you by others just because you are unattractive. I don't think Pinoys are like that.

C'mon. We all know Pinoys are very judgemental. Narrow pointy nose, light complexion, how someone dresses, where you go to college, even what province you're from..... Little things that get scrutinized and decide how people look at you. I was on the lucky side. But, I didn't like the double standard either. Gossip was just around every corner.

When I first arrived there, my legs were so white that girls kept rubbing their hands on my thighs.

"Shoo. Go away. Leave my legs alone."

This forum is full of the stereotyping if you look long enough and that's just the ones typed in English.

Back in New York, we had an old lady who just arrived from the PH. The very first thing she asked me (even before my name) is where did I graduate? I'm like, "What? I graduated college here in the US. But, I attended Mapua while I was there."

Another is when we attended a Fil-Am party where no one knew me. When I walked in, everybody suddenly became silent and started whispering. My wife said one of them remarked to her, "I didn't know your husband was Hispanic." Once my wife explained everything, then they welcomed me in.

That happened twice in two different Fil-Am parties.

[Wh1stl3r]

C'mon. We all know Pinoys are very judgemental. Narrow pointy nose, light complexion, how someone dresses, where you go to college, even what province you're from..... Little things that get scrutinized and decide how people look at you. I was on the lucky side. But, I didn't like the double standard either. Gossip was just around every corner.

When I first arrived there, my legs were so white that girls kept rubbing their hands on my thighs.

"Shoo. Go away. Leave my legs alone."

This forum is full of the stereotyping if you look long enough and that's just the ones typed in English.

Back in New York, we had an old lady who just arrived from the PH. The very first thing she asked me (even before my name) is where did I graduate? I'm like, "What? I graduated college here in the US. But, I attended Mapua while I was there."

Another is when we attended a Fil-Am party where no one knew me. When I walked in, everybody suddenly became silent and started whispering. My wife said one of them remarked to her, "I didn't know your husband was Hispanic." Once my wife explained everything, then they welcomed me in.

That happened twice in two different Fil-Am parties.

I guess I've been lucky to have never witnessed that kind of bullying, if you will. Maybe just a bit when I was a kid. But for majority of the time, my classmates/friends/coworkers have been the more politically correct ones.

Preference for a certain body type/height/complexion is there, but bullying the not-so-attractive? It just wasn't there. At least not out in the open.

Btw, I don't consider girls rubbing on my thighs to be a bad thing. It sounds good actually. 😁

[badkuk]

Btw, I don't consider girls rubbing on my thighs to be a bad thing. It sounds good actually. 😁

"Hey ladies, it gets whiter on the way up."

[Jun aka Pekto]

Btw, I don't consider girls rubbing on my thighs to be a bad thing. It sounds good actually. ��

I'm ticklish there.

It didn't take long for my legs to get dark. Being out in the sun all the time and swimming in salt water helped.

[Jun aka Pekto]

I guess I've been lucky to have never witnessed that kind of bullying, if you will. Maybe just a bit when I was a kid. But for majority of the time, my classmates/friends/coworkers have been the more politically correct ones.

Preference for a certain body type/height/complexion is there, but bullying the not-so-attractive? It just wasn't there. At least not out in the open.

It's not bullying. Just preconceived notions that should never have been. You don't see see them expressing it overtly. But, they sure do in their thoughts and behind your back.

I'm sure you've seen some who thought if you didn't graduate from this or that university in the PH, it means you're worthless. There are others who make fun of a dark complexion.

Anyway, back to the one complaining in the original post........

Before accusing anyone of being unfair, I would ask that guy to list down everything he did every month that deserved recognition, a pay raise, a higher pay grade, or just plain kudos and a pat on the back. If he can show that with a good history, then, he may have a good reason for complaining.